My Worst Fear
by SwanQueen4tw
Summary: Set after Boone. Myka and Pete go after a set of fountain pens that when touched will write your worst fear. Before both pens are neutralized, Myka's worst fear shows up in her bathroom.
I groaned inwardly as I read the case file. A 19th century fountain pen was causing people's worst fears to come true and it was on display in London. Five museum workers have been hospitalized from trying to get away from their fear. "Are you going to be okay, Mykes?"

 _Why must it be in that museum? Of all the museums in the world, the fountain pen has to be in the H.G. Wells Museum._ "I'll be fine." I tried putting on a brave face for Pete but failed. I could feel his and Steve's eyes on me. "Leave it alone, Steve."

Steve shrugged innocently. "I'm staying out of this. I'm just waiting for Claudia to finish getting ready. Then we're heading out."

"Look, H.G. made her choice to stay with Nate and I'm okay," Steve cleared his throat. "I have to deal with that. Even if that means going back to where we first met." I tried keeping my voice even but I'm sure Pete got a vibe.

"Okay. But if this is too much…"

"Pete, I'll be file."

Xxx

Thankfully, this time Pete and I arrived, the museum was closed. People were too scared to go inside because the local paper deemed the house as haunted. Memories from three years ago came flooding back. I couldn't help but smile thinking of H.G. and her flirtatious smile. _That woman came in and turned my life upside down. Scary thing is I wouldn't have changed a thing._

"Thinking about H.G.? I know that smile. Not to mention the vibe I just got nearly knocked me on my butt." Pete tried to keep the atmosphere light.

"Yeah. One night we talked about this house. H.G. told me about the different hidden doors and secret rooms she built in."

"Please be a kid and wander around." My brow rose at Pete's statement. "Mykes, the museum is closed. This is your _ONE_ chance to explore. It might bring you closure or something. I won't tell Artie."

"Thanks, Pete." Putting on my gloves, I started for the study. "Be careful and don't touch anything without your gloves." Books filled the oak shelves behind the redwood desk. _This is amazing._ I pulled the forth book from the right on the third shelf and waited for a hidden door to unlock. Just like H.G. said, the bookshelf moved just far enough for a person to enter. The room was empty except for another door that led to her bedroom. What used to be the author's chambers was just as elegant as she was.

 _I always kept things hidden from sight. Not that I didn't trust my brother, I didn't trust the women he brought home. I kept important things in a box under the floorboard just under my bed._

Removing the board, I reached into the darkness. My heart pounded when I pulled out a small wooden box. My hands trembled as I opened it. "Oh my God…" Inside were pictures of Christina and Helena together. A strand of long black hair stuck out of a small, red leather book. Flipping through the pages, I read each milestone Christina made. H.G.'s words were full of love for her daughter. Tears started to roll down my cheeks the more I read.

"Mykes? Mykes? Where are you?" I wanted to call out to Pete but I couldn't. "Mykes? Where are you…oh." Looking towards my partner, I wiped tears away with my sleeve. "What's that?"

"H.G.'s most precious things. It's all pictures of her and Christina. She kept a book of Christina's milestones." My voice cracked. "No one knows it's here…," I bit my lip. "I want to keep it?"

Pete knelt beside me. "What will you do with it?"

"I don't know." Standing, I cleared my throat. "Did you find the pen?"

"Nope. But I didn't finish looking because I got a vibe."

Tucking the box under my arm, I started for the door. "Well, let's finish looking." Pete took the living room while I started on the library. As I searched through the desk, I stumbled across a blue and black fountain pen. Opening a neutralizer bag, I picked up the pen. Before I could drop it inside, a sharp pain shot up my arm. "Ow!" Once the sparks faded, I noticed the pen had burnt a hole in my glove. "I got the pen, Pete!" Walking into the living room, I pinched the bridge of my nose. "Pete, what are you doing?"

There he sat with his feet propped up, flipping through a book, with a pipe hanging out of his mouth. "I found her pocket watch. It has a picture of H.G. and Christina inside. It was going to be an 18th birthday present." The watch was beautiful. Pure silver with the letters "CW" inscribed on the front. Inside it said: To my beautiful daughter. Love Mommy.

"Wow. Well, we have the pen. Let's go."

Xxx

Pete and I decided not to tell anyone about what we found. Once I put H.G.'s box in my own hiding place, I went to shower. _We are a lot alike. Both hiding things we hold dear under a floorboard in our bedrooms. What should I do with the box anyway? Should I give it to H.G. or just keep it? I know she's moved on with Nate but it's about Christina. What should I do?_ Turning off the water, I reached out for a towel. After securing it in place, I pushed open the curtain.

"Hello Myka." There sat H.G. on the counter with her long legs crossed.

"Helena?! What the hell are you doing here?" Quickly, I pulled closed the curtain. My face was beet red. _What the hell? The pen was neutralized! Why is H.G. in my bathroom?!_ _And she saw me in a towel!_

"Well, Darling, I was hoping you could answer that question. I was reading in the living room and then all of a sudden here I am. And why is my house deemed as haunted?"

It..a…an artifact caused worst fears to come true." _The pen! That must be why she's here. But why?_ "We neutralized it yesterday."

"Edgar Allen Poe's pen set."

"Yeah. Wait, set?" I peeked my head around the curtain, making sure to keep the rest of my body out of view. "There are two of them?"

"Yes, there are." Something dark hovered above the author. H.G. made sure to never look in my direction. _She remembers how self-conscious I am._ "Would you like me to give you some privacy so you can get dressed and stop hiding behind that curtain?" She tried hiding a smirk.

"I…," _I don't want you to leave._ "Uh, just, turn around. I don't know how to explain why you're here if someone sees you."

Helena did as I asked and slid off the counter to face the door. "Not to mention how curious young Peter and Claudia would be to see me walking out of the bathroom while you were in the shower."

I dropped my shirt at H.G.'s statement. I hadn't thought about them. "What do you know about the pens?"

"There are two of them. One will make your worst fear come true and the other keeps that fear from happening." The older woman paused a moment. "You're wondering how I know this, aren't you."

"The thought did cross my mind somewhere between 'oh my God H.G. is sitting on my counter while I'm naked' and 'oh hi Helena.' You can turn around now."

The author chuckled softly. "I always did know how to make an entrance."

"Yes you did." I paused biting my lip. "It's good to see you."

"You as well." It was her turn to fall silent. "Myka, if the fear pen was found by someone in the museum that means they may have found something else…." H.G.'s voice trailed off.

"No, they didn't. I did. Follow me." Helena did as I asked. Sneaking quietly into my room, I closed the door. "Since the museum was closed, I let curiosity get the best of me."

"You tested all the secret doors, didn't you?" Dark eyes watched me from the bed as I pulled out the small box. "We both hid important things in the floor."

"We're alike in many ways." Joining the older woman, I placed the box between us. "I found this and kept it. Why do you seem so…," my voice trailed off.

"Ashamed?"

"Not the word I would have used but we can use it."

H.G.'s fingertips traced over the engravings on the box. "I found the pens after Christina was murdered. I used the darker pen on the two men who killed my daughter before I finished the job. I knew I should have turned them into the warehouse but I was in so much pain." The older woman's voice started to waver.

Before I could stop myself, I placed my hand over hers. "I understand." Squeezing gently, I gave Helena a reassuring smile.

"You always did. I just wonder which pen you touched. Unless you neutralize them both, they still work." The blood drained from my face. _Shit!_ "The only thing that comes to mind for my reason being here is that you feared never seeing me again. That being said, you must have touched the blue and black pen."

"Yeah, that's the one that burnt through my glove." I had to look away. I was caught. I could never hide things from this woman.

"You feared never seeing me again?" All I did was nod. "Myka, I said we would get together for coffee." I began to tremble. Word vomit was bubbling up my throat. "Myka, you're…"

"I can't….," Standing, I moved away from my bed. _If she touches me, I'll lose it. I'll tell her everything and ruin the friendship we have. I can be happy with just having her as a friend. It's better than not having her at all._

"You're walking away from your truth again." Her voice was gentle but stern.

"So are you." Turning, I instantly regretted the words. "Helena, I'm sorry. I-,"

"You're right." Stormy eyes met mine. "I have walked away from my truth; again."

"What do you mean?"

"Isn't it obvious? Helena G. Wells is anything but a domestic housewife. Before you freak out, no, we're not married." She paused, "And never will be."

"You seem happy with him and his daughter."

"I am. But I'm also bored. I catch myself sketching inventions in my journal." She paused, "I'm actually keeping a journal. That alone should tell you something."

I tried not to laugh but failed. "Yes, that does say something."

"And I'm not fulfilled like I was here when I was with you." My heart raced. _With you. What does she mean by that?_ "A reply, of any sort, would be nice. You know I'm not one to spill my heart out."

"What do you mean by 'with you'?" I rejoined the vulnerable woman on the bed.

"You know me better than anyone and have always understood me. Even through my 'I want to destroy the world' phase." A chuckled bubbled up my throat. "And yet, you're so terrified of the idea that someone could love you. I know that stems from Sam but I can't help but wonder if it has something to do with me as well." I didn't dare speak. _If she knows me as well as she thinks she does, she'll see it in my eyes._ "I never meant for you to think I didn't want you. I just couldn't betray you again. Nor could I be around the warehouse. And you're such a fantastic agent that I didn't want you to leave for me."

H.G.'s words filtered through my brain one by one until the words 'want you.' "Wait, what?"

"I wondered when that was going to sink in. Myka, you're a gorgeous young woman who is powerful, brilliant, and independent. Everything I want in a lover. You're an equal to me. But I can't get mixed up with the warehouse. Lives get ruined. Your life was almost ruined."

"But you were the one who fixed it. _You_ got me to come back to the warehouse." _There's so much I want to say but I don't know where to start._ "And I wasn't sure whether you wanted me or not. I thought you did but then Nate came along."

"After you left, I wondered why I called you. For the longest time I told myself it was because I was doing the right thing. When really I think it was because I wanted to see you. And then we fell right back into our old ways."

"The police station." I chuckled softly and leaned back on the bed. "A warning would have been nice."

A mischievous smirk tugged at the author's lips. "But what fun would that be? I like keeping you on your toes." Sighing, Helena laid back too.

 _Laying this close to her, knowing how she feels. It makes me want to just take her in my arms and never let go._ "I'm surprised Nate hasn't called me from your phone yet."

"He probably won't." My brow furrowed when H.G. laughed. "I have you as 'elegant giraffe' in my phone."

I snorted. "Really? Well, I can't say much. You're 'The Unicorn Queen' in my phone."

Rising onto one elbow, Helena looked down at me. _She is gorgeous._ "I'm not sure if I should be offended or not."

"You're one of a kind and magical." _How corny am I going to get around this woman?_

"I'm a woman of science. Not magic."

"And yet we've both worked at the warehouse." Silence fell between us. Both lost in the others' eyes. Slowly, H.G. leaned down to place a soft kiss on my lips. Instantly, I laced a hand in silky dark locks. My skin was on fire when Helena cupped my cheek. Her hand started moving lower and found purchase on my chest. A soft moan escaped my throat as H.G. deepened the kiss. "Helena…"

"Ssshh." Our tongues danced a passionate tango. _My body is buzzing. And I want to feel her skin on mine._ "Myka, we shouldn't. But I can't. I don't have the strength to stop."

"Then don't." Those two words lit a fire in the author. Clothes littered the bed and floor. No words were spoken after that. Soft moans and whimpers filled the room. We got lost in the pure ecstasy of each other.

Nearly two hours later, I found myself resting my head over H.G.'s heart. Her strong arms held me close as she kissed my hair. "What do we do now?" Her voice was soft.

"I don't know." My voice cracked. Tears started to sting my eyes. I didn't want to let Helena go but I knew she had to leave.

"I need to call Nate." My stomach dropped. "May I use your phone?"

"Yeah." Reaching over, I gave Helena the phone.

"Thank you." I settled back against the author as she dialed the number. "Nate, I apologize for leaving so suddenly. I was called away on an assignment and forgot my phone. I should be back by tomorrow." Bowing my head, I tried not to cry. Noticing my dismay, Helena pulled me closer. "Bye Nate." After disconnecting the call, H.G. placed the phone back. "I'm not ashamed of you. I just don't know what to say or do in this situation."

"Do what makes you happy. Truly happy." Biting my lip, I tried to keep myself from breaking. _I can't say goodbye to her again. This time it may just kill me._

"There lies the problem. I'm happy with you but you work at the warehouse. And before you say it, no, you're not quitting on my account."

"You could always be a forensic scientist here…."

"In South Dakota? Where would I get a job?"

"Or maybe write again? There is that bookstore in town." I tried to think of anything that could keep her here.

"You're trying quite hard, Darling." There was a laugh in the author's voice. "I have a life in Boone with Nate…." Her voice trailed off.

"Fine." Sitting up, I took the confuter to cover me. "Go then."

"Myka," H.G. sat and tried to place a hand on my back but I moved away. "I was going to say, I have a life in Boone as Emily Lake. My life as Helena Wells is here, with you."

Guilt churned my stomach. "Helena, I'm sorry." Tears started to roll down my cheeks.

"Don't cry Darling." Cupping my cheek, H.G. wiped away my tears with her thumbs. "I love you, Myka. And I made a rather large mistake. Give me time, and I'll fix it. I'll start tomorrow when I go back to Boone. Although, I think Nate knows my heart belongs to you."

"What do you mean?"

"After he saw us together, he's never looked at me the same. He's distant now."

Looking down, I tried not to smile. _I feel guilty but then I'm happy. What the Hell does this woman do to me?_ "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." The author gently pulled me back into her arms. "Why hasn't anyone come up looking for you?"

"Because they know that when I come up here and close my door that I want to be left alone. Thankfully, both of us can be quiet…"

Helena chuckled. "Yes, but hopefully one day you won't need to be quiet."

Xxx

For the next week, I was on edge. Pete and Steve kept asking what was wrong but I kept brushing them off. I think they knew it had to do with H.G. _Please come back to me Helena. Please don't stay in Boone._ Steve and Claudia were out on an assignment, Pete was on a date with Kelly, and Artie was in the warehouse so, besides Abigail, I had the B&B to myself. As I turned the page of my book, there was a light knock on the door.

"I'll get it. Hopefully it's my Amazon order." Chuckling inwardly, I remembered the psychiatrist's annoyance with UPS. "Myka, it's for you." Looking up, I saw H.G. walk inside.

"Hello Myka."

"You're back." Closing the book, I went to wrap the older woman in a hug. Panic rushed through me when I didn't see a suitcase. Before I could ask, H.G. smiled.

"All of my things are in the car. I didn't want to assume I'd be staying here." Chocolate eyes spoke volumes of vulnerability.

"I finally have you back in my life. I'm not letting you out of my sight for a while." I paused remembering we weren't alone. "Abigail, this is H.G. Wells. Yes, the H.G. Wells, Father of Science Fiction."

"And the H.G. Wells whose name is connected with yours. It's a pleasure to finally meet you." The shorter woman entered the living room once more. "It's late; I'm turning in for the night."

"You as well but it's only seven o' clock." Helena's brow creased.

"Abigail knows there's not much privacy here. She knows when to make herself scarce."

"Good to know." Cupping my cheek, H.G. kissed me gently. "It's good to be home."

"I'm glad you're here. There's still some water in the kettle, would you like a cup of tea?"

"That would be lovely. We can move my things in tomorrow." Bringing a tea tray to the living room, Helena and I snuggled on the couch. _My life is perfect. I have a job I love and I'm with the woman I love._ "Since you won't ask but I know you're dying to know, Nate actually took it well. After I got back, we had a long talk while Adelaide was at a friend's house. He actually knew the break up was coming."

"How'd he know that?"

"He saw the way I looked at you." H.G. let her cheek rest on top of my head while mine was on her shoulder. "And he realized then that my heart belonged to you."

"I can't say that I'm too sorry..." A soft chuckle escaped the author's throat before taking another sip of tea. It was nearly ten before we heard a car pull up. "That's probably Pete. I figured he would stay at Kelly's tonight."

"Where are Claudia and Steve?" Neither of us moved.

"In New York trying to find an artifact." Before I could continue, the front door opened.

"Mykes? There's a strange car outside. What's going…" H.G. and I looked towards my speechless partner. "H.G.?"

"Peter." Tension was high.

"I've been getting 'H.G. vibes' for the past week. Now I see why. Are you back for good?" I could feel a deep blush making its way up my neck.

"I'm not sure what an 'H.G. vibe' is but yes, I'm back for good."

"Good." Pete smiled. "I'm glad. Now, I'm going to bed. Night guys." Both of us watched skeptically as my partner walked up the stairs.

"No sexist joke or comment. Is Peter feeling well?" H.G. kept her voice low.

"If you have sex, keep it quiet."

Xxx

I groaned when my alarm sounded the next morning. After shutting it off, I rolled over to see the space behind me empty. Adrenaline surged through me until I noticed the yellow sticky note on Helena's pillow.

 _Downstairs with fresh coffee. –H.G._

 _Thank God. I'm not sure what I'd do if she left me again._ Walking down the stairs, I heard laughter in the dining room. H.G. and Claudia were laughing at Pete who sat with what looked like raspberry filling on his shirt. "Oh my God. Mykes, you missed it. Pete bit into the doughnut and the filling went everywhere!" Claudia could barely keep herself from laughing.

"That's Pete for you." I took a seat next to Helena. "Morning."

"Good morning, Darling." Taking a deep breath, I hummed. "A dark almond color, just how you like it."

"Mhm. And, let me guess, tea?" I motioned towards the cup in H.G.'s hand.

"Of course. Oh Claudia, I sketched a new grappler design. If you'd like to help me build-,"

"Yes! I'll bring the stuff we need from the warehouse here so we can start." She paused, "I wonder if Myka will covet this one."

"I wasn't coveting it." I tried keeping a straight face. "When did you and Steve get back?"

"Sure. Because you were too busy _coveting_ something else of H.G.'s." Pete wiggled his eyebrows.

"Pete!" Everyone laughed. "Really?"

"Myka, if he didn't make jokes, I think his head would explode." Claudia finished her artery clogging breakfast. "We got back early this morning. Steve's doing his meditation thing."

"So it is true." Everyone jumped as Mrs. Frederic made herself known. "Helena."

"Irene." There was a mutual respect between the women that none of us would ever understand.

"For good this time." It wasn't a question.

Glancing towards me, H.G. smiled. "Yes. I said I wanted a normal life. I didn't realize a normal life would have me keeping a journal."

"You kept a journal?" Claudia was dumbfounded. "You were _that_ bored? Geez."

"Yes, I was that bored. I still stand with my decision about leaving the warehouse."

"Fair enough." The Caretaker's eyes moved between Helena and I. "Is it safe to assume the two of you are together?"

"Yes." I could hardly keep my happiness contained.

"Good. Now maybe the warehouse will stop acting up every time the subject of Helena comes up. Your emotion caused many artifacts to act up. Certain measures needed to be taken."

"Mrs. Frederic, what do you mean by that?" I glanced around the table. Everyone else was just as confused.

"While yes, the darker of Poe's pens was originally in Helena's home, the lighter of the pens wasn't. I needed the two of you to come face to face. I had no idea she would turn up in your bathroom."

"She what?" Claudia and Pete tried not to choke.

A blush crept up my neck remembering that night. "It's a long story." Helena chuckled knowingly. _She knows exactly what I'm remembering._

"I can't believe I didn't realize it before." Everyone's attention turned to H.G. "As you said, the darker pen was in my home but the lighter wasn't. You planted it, didn't you?"

"I did, yes." Mrs. Frederic smirked.

"But using the artifacts for our own gain is against the rules." The Caretaker's brow rose. "Not that I'm complaining. I'm glad Helena is back."

"I'm the Caretaker, Agent Bering. I can use the artifacts if I feel it is necessary for the wellbeing of my warehouse and my agents."

"Well, all that matters is that Bering and Wells are back together." Claudia raised her orange juice.

"I second that." Pete joined. Laughing, Helena and I did the same. At some point while we clinked our glasses, Mrs. Frederic disappeared.

"I see Mrs. Frederic's plan worked." Artie walked into the dining room with a smirk.

"You knew about this too?" My brow furrowed.

"She let me know that the mate of an artifact was going to go 'missing' for a few days." Artie passed out case files. "Pete, Myka you'll be doing this one. But keep in contact with H.G.," he paused a moment realizing what he said. "You may need her help with information."

"I'll wait here until Myka calls. I've had a book idea for a while and can finally start it." Before I could ask, Helena continued. "And yes, you may read it when I'm finished."

"Good. You're typewriter should be here soon. You seem to do your best writing at night. It's a good thing I like the sound." I saw Pete open his mouth, most likely to make a sexist comment. "Not a word."

"You're no fun!" The man child folded his arms with a pout.

"If you all are done joking around, would you get to work?" Artie grumbled. "And Helena," the words were hard for him to say. "It's good that you're back. We're _all_ glad you're back." Everyone caught his emphasis on the word 'all'. It brought warmth to my heart that he felt that way about H.G.

"Awwww!" Claudia snickered when a death glare was shot her way.

Shaking my head, I finished my coffee and kissed H.G. on the cheek. "See you soon."

"Until then, Darling."


End file.
